We all know Hollywood stars can be a bit eccentric at times, but when it comes to naming their kids, they go above and beyond. Celebrity baby names often aren’t even suitable for a pet, let alone a human being. They sound more like a new candle scent or eyeshadow pallet than something anyone should ever call a baby.
While this trend has calmed down a bit in recent years, 2020 has brought out the crazy in everyone, and pregnant celebs are no exception. Check out these celebrity baby names that are absolute garbage.
It feels like Katy Perry has been pregnant for a decade, but considering March alone this year felt just as long, that makes sense. She and partner, Orlando Bloom, announced the birth of their daughter just last week, and the name they chose is just absurd. Considering they’ve had an on-again, off-again relationship since 2016, it’s a miracle the two made it through Perry’s pregnancy without splitting.
So, what did the “California Gurl” singer and “The Pirates of the Caribbean” actor decide to name their child? Daisy Dove. With a name like that, this future flower child better inherit some of her parents’ talents. How could anyone named Daisy Dove not work in the entertainment industry?
Former “Glee” star, Lea Michele, married businessman Zandy Reich in 2019. The couple didn’t wait long to start a family, and their quarantine-baby was born just last week. Despite their son’s name being quite odd, they have a (sort-of) reasonable explanation for where it came from. There son’s name? Ever Leo.
When planning their wedding, Michele explained how they would incorporate both of their heritage, saying:
“I’m Italian and my fiancé is Jewish, so I think it’s going to be about blending our cultures and making sure that we do things that really honor both of our heritages.”
It seems like they did the same thing with their son. “Ever” is a Hebrew name that means “to cross over” or “beyond.” “Leo” has Latin origins meaning “lion,” and is a common Italian name. Perhaps a family name would be more suitable for their next child.
The Bella twins may have traded in wrestling rings for teething rings, but fans still can’t get enough of them. They both gave birth to sons in early August, just a day apart. While they couldn’t have planned it better if they tried, the sisters seem to have completely different opinions on what passes for a suitable baby name.
Nikki Bella welcomed her first son with pro dancer, Artem Chigvintsev, providing him with a name that is quite normal. Matteo Artemovich. Ordinary enough, right? Her sister Brie clearly didn’t get the message on bad celebrity baby names, though. She and her husband Daniel Bryan decided to go with something a bit more unique. Buddy Dessert. Despite being spelled differently, Brie made sure to let her fans know that his middle name is pronounced desert.
Grammy award-winning artist Ciara recently gave birth to her second child with her husband and Seattle Seahawks quarterback, Russell Wilson. Born in July, the couple is one of the many to experience what pregnancy is like during a worldwide pandemic. Ciara and Wilson also have a daughter, Sienna, and the singer has a son from another relationship, Future.
Both relatively common names, right? So, what happened with this kid? They’re clearly capable of properly naming a child but simply chose not to. That should be illegal! And the name? Win Harrison. Hopefully, he grows up to be a winner. Otherwise, his entire life will be a contradiction!
Iggy Azalea might be the queen of deception. She somehow managed to keep her entire pregnancy under wraps, only to surprise her fans by announcing her son’s birth in an Instagram story. The now-deleted story was posted on July 10 and has left people with more questions than answers. While the child’s father hasn’t been revealed, some believe it might be rapper Playboi Carti. He and Azalea have been romantically linked since 2018.
Her original post read:
“I have a son. I kept waiting for the right time to say something, but it feels like the more time passes, the more I realize I’m always going to feel anxious to share news that giant with the world. I want to keep his life private but wanted to make it clear he is not a secret & I love him beyond words.”
So, what’s her son’s name? Onyx Carter. It makes him sound more like the son of a Backstreet Boy than a rapper. Considering Iggy’s real name is Amethyst, the two kind-of go together.
By far the worst celebrity baby name of 2020 (and possibly of all-time) was conceived by Elon Musk and partner Grimes. It’s so bad that when Musk revealed his son’s name on Twitter, people thought he was joking. It turns out, he wasn’t. Grimes tried to explain the meaning behind her son’s name in a tweet, but it didn’t exactly clear things up.
So, what did they name him? X Æ A-12. Not only is the pronunciation impossible to guess, but the name is likely illegal. Most states only allow names to contain the 26 letters of the alphabet. No special characters are allowed. If this is what his parents are naming him, though, his name’s legality is the last thing this kid will need to worry about.