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Post Malone Has a New Album, but Don’t Have Taylor Swift Expectations

Last Updated September 23, 2020 2:09 PM
Aaron Weaver
Last Updated September 23, 2020 2:09 PM
  • Post Malone appeared on the Joe Rogan Experience podcast today.
  • It’s likely a publicity stunt to get people interested in his upcoming album.
  • While Taylor Swift just dropped a gem of a quarantine album in “Folklore,” don’t expect the same from Post Malone.

“All of my ideas are kind of like mistakes.” That quote is from Post Malone during his recent interview with Joe Rogan.

If you ever get the idea to listen to Post Malone’s music, you’ll soon realize what he means.

With a new album in the works,  the rapper appears set to make another mistake.

Quarantine inspired Taylor Swift to take risks and dive deeper into her musical instincts. Her “Folklore” album has received critical acclaim.

Post Malone has also been working on a quarantine album, but the results won’t be nearly as impressive.

Post Malone Has Some Work To Do

Post Malone seems like a good guy. But that doesn’t mean he’s a great artist.

But what can you expect when your entire persona is ripped from an online rap-name generator? 

If you think the Artist Who Can’t Think of a Name For Himself will suddenly blow your mind with a quarantine album, you will be sorely disappointed.

Post Malone
At least Nickleback created their own name. | Source: Twitter 

What has Post proven so far? He can write a catchy tune, but so can the creators of the McDonald’s jingle.

His lyrics read they were spat out from a random rap-lyric generator. Check out these lines from his hit “Pyscho,”

My roof look like a no-show, got diamonds by the boatload
Don’t act like you my friend when I’m rollin’ through my ends, though

Or how about these gems from “Rockstar,”

F*ckin’ with me, call up on a Uzi
And show up, man them the shottas
When my homies pull up on your block
They make that thing go grrra-ta-ta-ta (pow, pow, pow)

It’s not exactly Shakespeare. It’s not exactly Shakespeare’s dog.

Lyrics do not get any more basic than this.

Grrra-ta-ta-ta (pow, pow, pow)?

First of all, Post, you were raised in a loving household in a quaint Dallas suburb.

The only things on your block going Grrra-ta-ta-ta are the lawn sprinklers. For someone who postures as ‘authentic,’ this is hilariously off-base.

Taylor Swift Stretches New Muscles in “Folklore”

At least Taylor Swift is true to herself. Her surprise album, “Folklore,” gives us a stripped-down, earthy version of Swift’s music. And the critics were there for it.

Rolling Stone gave it 4.5 stars out of 5,  calling it “head-spinning” and “heartbreaking.”

The Atlantic describes the record: 

Yet across arrangements both luminous and leaden, Swift’s writing is excellent—the stuff of which obsessive listening is built. Her melodies, while singsong and sturdy as always, convey depth with jagged cadences and curly, questioning inflections.

You hear that, Post Malone? Taylor Swift clearly puts effort into her songwriting, and it pays off.

Quarantine alone will not make anyone’s art better.

You still have to put in the work. And if Post hasn’t done the work to become a better writer, then his new album will be more of the same mainstream, auto-tune dribble that we’re used to.

I honestly hope he proves me wrong, and this article blows up in my face.

Grrra-ta-ta-ta! 

But until that happens, expect another mistake.


Disclaimer: The opinions in this article do not necessarily reflect the views of CCN.com.