I’m Honestly Scared Trump’s Going to Drink a Bottle of Lysol

• Donald Trump infamously suggested that disinfectants can treat the coronavirus.
• The world erupted in the disbelief that even Trump could be that stupid, while even the makers of Lysol have been forced to warn people against drinking the disinfectant.
• But maybe Trump’s deranged comments are a cynical trick to distract people from his incompetence.

You may not be aware, but Donald Trump is a medical expert. Last night, he suggested that injecting disinfectants — such as Lysol — can treat coronavirus.

Yes, you read that right. The President of the United States of America speculated that disinfectant “knocks” Covid-19 out “in a minute.”

Predictably enough, the Western world erupted in disbelief at Trump’s bizarre medical counsel. Even for someone as notoriously unhinged as Trump, his latest faux pas crossed a new line of dementia. Even Reckitt Benckiser — the maker of Lysol — had to issue a warning not to ingest their products.

“Dr. Trump”: Maybe Disinfectant Can Cure Coronavirus

Donald Trump has done many stupid things over the years. From throwing paper towels at Puerto Ricans to his unforgettable “covfefe” remark, he’s the undisputed winner of the “America’s Dumbest President Ever” award. But last night, he gifted the world what may be his greatest gaffe yet.

Speaking at his regular coronavirus briefing, Trump said:

And then I see the disinfectant. It knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside, or almost a cleaning.

Without offering any evidence, Trump speculated that disinfectants like Lysol could, when injected into the human body, treat the coronavirus. I mean, has he finally lost his last marble? Or has he swallowed just one-too-many bottles of Lysol?

Presumably, he bases this idea on the fact that disinfectant kills the coronavirus when used to clean surfaces. But he seems to disregard the very strong possibility that it would have many unfortunate side-effects if ingested or injected.

But Trump didn’t stop there. He suggested that somehow shining ultraviolet light inside the body could also help fight off a Covid-19 infection.

So, supposing we hit the body with a tremendous, uh, whether it’s ultraviolet, or just very powerful light.

So rather than, you know, testing people for coronavirus more, and increasing funding for hospitals, ICU beds, and ventilators, Trump wants to distribute Lysol to every person in the country. And he also wants to send them a voucher for a free hour at their nearest tanning salon.

Hang on: Tanning salons? Disinfectant? Isn’t Trump just describing his morning routine here? Does he think being orange and foaming at the mouth is the best defense against the coronavirus?

Lysol Maker Responds Because This Is How the World Works Now

Needless to say, most sane people in America responded less-than supportively to Trump’s disinfectant comments.

More than one person picked up on the curious connection between ultraviolet light and Donald Trump’s manly tan.

And just in case you think harebrained comments about injecting disinfectant and Lysol are all fun and games, actual doctors appeared to set you straight.

It seemed that everyone got into the act of blasting Trump. Even the maker of Lysol issued a statement to the effect that, you know, swallowing the disinfectant isn’t a good idea. Who woulda thunk it?

But not everyone sought to mock Trump’s insanity. Boris “Britain’s Trump” Johnson, the U.K. Prime Minister, reported that he’d spoken with the president and that he would be taking steps to ramp up the production of disinfectant.

Okay, that one was a parody account. But still.

More seriously, what was Donald Trump thinking with his comments? Is he certifiably senile? Or is he merely distracting people in whatever way he can from his abject failure to protect America?

The answer, as ever, is probably both.

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily reflect the views of CCN.com.